Greetings and Welcome to our comprehensive dating articles, tips and advice archives. If you're new to the online dating scene, and are starting to get frustrated due to the sheer number of dating sites, and the 40 million other singles trying to hook just like you, fear not! Reading through our tips and advice pages will surely enlighten your burden, and ease your way.
Singles sites are popping up by the thousands! To help ease your frustration, we've joined and subsequently reviewed every single online dating site and matchmaking service that features at least one million profiles. If it's not on this site, take our word for it, don't waste your time!
Tips for writing effective personal ads and personal profilesSo, my little stud muffins you want to place a personal ad, find the love of your life, a sex partners, or good old fashion romance but don't know where to start? You've come to the right place! First, and oh so important, you're going to need a good, clear, recent photo of yourself. If don't want to use a photo in your personal ad profile, that is of course ok, but keep in mind that you'll get many more responses if there is a photo, and many singles won't even bother to look at your ad if a pic is missing. I'm sure you can understand that there are very few people willing to meet someone if they have no idea what they look like.
Don't have a photo? That's no excuse, mi amigo. Digital cameras have come way down in price, and so have scanners. If you don't have either, I'm sure you know someone who does. If all else fails, almost any place that develops photos can now put your pictures on a CD. Unless you're good with a self-timer, have a friend help you with your photos. Now don't go telling me you're embarassed to tell a friend you're thinking of placing a personal ad. This isn't 1995 anymore. ;) It's perfectly acceptable nowadays. You wouldn't be embarassed to tell someone you're going out to a club and hope to meet someone, would you? Same thing.
What should be in the photo? You with your dick hanging out -- NOT! That should come later. :) What is in the photo doesn't really matter, as long as you can see your face (so ditch the sunglasses ) and that you look happy, content, and like a decent person. You do NOT want to look desperate, unkept, pycho maniac, seeking a next victim! Just try to look natural.
There are of course many schools of thought when it comes to deciding on how to write a personal ad. You do NOT want to look desperate, unkept, pycho maniac, seeking a next victim! Just try to look natural. In truth there is no way that is absolutely correct when you are considering your personally ad. Your best bet is to just write your honest feelings down and hope that they convey something that sparks the interest of a reader. Your ad is just a click or two away!
Before writing your own profile read how others have written their ads. Notice which ads attract your attention and make note of what drew your attention to those ads.
Be creative and make up a catchy title. Remember that first impressions count. Honesty is always the best policy even though they say about 35% of personals contain misleading information. What's the point? Saying your 35 when your 45 only ruins the chance of a quality relationship when the truth comes out -- And it ALWAYS does! Bring out your best qualities in your ad. Keep your profile positive and upbeat. Show who you really are (ie, if you have a sense of humor use that to your benefit) Do not include adult content in your ad. Leave a little to the imagination and something to maybe discuss later after getting to know someone better.
Make sure you fill out the narrative part of your profile. That is where you can really express yourself and the more you tell about yourself the more responses you can expect to receive. Don't limit yourself by location. We live in a portable world! With the internet, telephones, airplanes, etc, the world is a small place so don't just look for someone in your neighborhood. Take time to browse all the profiles. Your soulmate may be next door but they may be in another state or country.
Write and respond to numerous singles that you think might be a match. The more people you take the opportunity to meet the greater your chance of meeting that someone special to spend some quality time with.
Always remember internet safety. NEVER include your email address, a mailing address, or phone numbers in your ad. If you include any of these in your ad, your ad will be deleted and your membership terminated. Once you have joined and your profile is on file drop by the chat room and get to know the other members. Chat is one of the best ways to actually converse with other singles online, and countless matches are made in singles chatrooms alone
Personal Ad Basics 101 - Schools in Session!The premise for good personal ad writing is to "sell yourself." You do this by sounding as if you are approachable by emphasizing your best points and through not making disastrous mistakes. Every word will be considered by others. Don't give any reason to reject you, or sound as if you would reject them. The idea is to get as many letters from different people as possible. After you corresponded and talked with them agile an, you and they can better make a decision about whether to move the relationship toward a higher level. And most important of all--be honest. Tell about the person you are, not the person you want to be.
Here are some rules we have found to be helpful and effective:
- This rule is the first one for a reason: Sell yourself, don't sell the type of person you are looking for. Others will read your letter to find out about you not the type of person they are looking for. When you start listing all the things you are looking for in a mate, what are you doing? You are getting more and more specific about your "ideal partner" and that rapidly narrows your pool of potentials. No one has exactly all of the qualities you are looking for. If you are less specific about what you are looking for, you may receive a letter from a wonderful person with a lot to offer, that you might not have normally considered. By being so exacting and specific in the type of person, you are throwing away a lot of possibilities. And, if you do get a letter from someone who doesn't match your interests, you can always turn them down in a polite letter.
The idea is to get as many letters as possible. In the search for that special someone, volume is always better. A happily married couple visited our office on their wedding anniversary. The lady reported receiving more than 100 letters from her Country Connections subscription and didn't know what to do. She let her father read through the letters and he gave her one and said, "This guy's a keeper, you better write him." She did and the rest is history. They have now been married five years.
- This is one for the men. Stop writing that you are looking for a "slender woman." Guys, have you ever met a woman who thought she was slender? No offense to the women who are reading this but nearly all will say they would like to lose a few pounds. When a guy writes that he is looking for a slender woman, that is akin to writing that they are looking for a super model. Many will be afraid to write. Men have more tolerance for body types than they think.
- This is one for the women. Many men want a slender woman and the women want a "guy." To a man nothing sends up a red flag faster than writing about his finances. Have you ever meet a man who said he wants a woman to marry him for his money? Although they might act like boys with costly toys, men want to be loved for who they are, not how much they have. Writing how you are looking for a financially secure guy, is going to scare a lot of men off and limit your responses.
- Men, believe it or not, how well you make a living counts for a lot in your attractiveness. If you can't hold a job, save money, pay your bills and be financially responsible, you need to set your loneliness aside and start improving yourself. It wouldn't be fair to you or the woman to bring her into a relationship where you are not floating above the financial waters. Financially security is important but don't flaunt it.
- Ladies: physical attractiveness is important. A healthy, active woman is more attractive than one who is sedentary and unmotivated. If you can live a more healthy lifestyle, it could aid you in your search for that special someone. If you are exercising or doing things to improve your health, they could be a selling point if used subtly.
- Some single people are afraid to reveal their age or weight and leave those questions vague. To someone reading your letter, this could appear as though you have something to hide. Letters and profiles are not the place to be deceptive. It is best be open and show who you really are.
- Subscribers who send pictures to be published with their personal profile always seem to get more letters. And more letters means a high probability of success. However, don't send just any picture. If you don't have a good picture, have a friend taken of you. Remember, people are going to to be looking at your photo and using it to help them decide if they want to write a letter. Please provide us with a flattering photo. We have received them but driver's license photos and pictures with a former spouse are not real helpful. Neither are pictures taken 10 or 20 years ago. The best photos show happy, pleasant to be around people.
- Even though the profile form is the same for everyone, you have an opportunity to write about yourself at the bottom of the form. Use this space to write something original and creative. Be yourself. Be different from the other subscribers. Make yourself standout. as a person with something unique and wonderful to offer to others. The more information you provide the easier it is for our staff to prepare your profile. We remember the lady who wrote, "I can dig postholes with the best of them." Her profile stood out and she received lots of mail.
- When it comes to hobbies and leisure activities men like men things and women like women things. Fortunately, our interests sometimes crossover and we find things in common with someone ease. And common ground is the number one reason we enter into relationships with others. When writing every word becomes important for selling yourself. That is why both men and women should first include those hobbies and interests which would also be of interest to others. If you are a woman who likes to watch college football, by all means list this. And men if you like to cook, women would consider that a golden nugget of information.
Be a good student and check your work!Edit, revise, re-edit again! You need not be a Rhodes Scholar to impress a belle, but you should take heed of your writing skills. Avoid babble that looks like you've just left a keg party. Make sure you check your punctuation and spelling. If you're not great at spelling, a dictionary is a wise investment. Read and re-read your profile; if something sounds or looks stupid, change it.
There is no need to redefine yourself and your image, but you should take some time to make sure you are portraying the image you want your potential mate to see. Build a better you by working on the little things. None of us are perfect, and we all have things that we'd like to change. For some of us, it's the beer bellies that we picked up in college, for others, it's a pesky hairline that keeps running away from our eyebrows, and for some of us, it's the inability to grow good facial hair. In the big picture, no one cares, but you should make changes in your life by working on the little things that you're self conscious about. Get a haircut. Grab a new set of weekend clothes that fit your style, and most importantly, fit your body.